and Words
Chances are when said and done
Who’ll be the lucky ones
Who make it all the way?
Though you say I could be your answer
Nothing lasts forever
No matter how it feels today
Chances are, we’ll find a new equation
Chances rolled away from me
Chances are all they hope to be
Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.
We all have those movies we love. They’re the kind of movie where you can recite large portions of the dialogue; this can be either endearing or annoying depending on with whom you watch the film. This is the kind of film where you are compelled to finish if you should run upon it as you channel graze. I have several films that qualify, but certainly The Blind Side is among them.
The film is based on the book by the same name; it is the real-life account of Michael Oher. It effectively frames the story that is as engaging in its significance as it is endearing. It’s simply one of those stories that makes you smile. As the credits roll from the film, they start with a slideshow of pictures and this particular song. I simply can’t hear this song and not see those pictures in my mind.
Even the verses in the song are uplifting and filled with hope. It speaks of two lives not only fated to be together, but also intentionally continue to travel together.
The film is a story of triumph. It’s a story of a black teen who grew up with a pretty raw deal, without any real parents; he lived from couch to couch. The movie starts with one adult, a friend of the family, advocating for him to get into a private school. He initially navigates it all alone, in a predominantly white school and mostly fails. You watch him transition as he forms friendships, builds trust, and carries himself, in unassuming ways, from day to day.
Little by little, it starts to change; his fortune turns. First, a boy undaunted by Michael’s stature chats with him, after a few exchanges they become friends. Next, a teacher discovers that he is indeed listening and learning, though in his own way. She administers his tests verbally and he passes, and soon other teachers follow suit. Michael starts to pass.
One fateful night, the trajectory of his life changes with one initial act of kindness. The parents of the boy who befriended him watch him as he walks slowly to the gymnasium on a cold, rainy night; he sought shelter. They put him up for the night and he never left. He goes through many ‘firsts’. He had not only never had his own room but never even had a bed. This fact alone was enough to drive his new ‘mother’ to tears.
Along the way, he hits a number of milestones. Like getting a driver’s license, which is something we may take for granted, but is truly meaningful for someone who doesn’t have any documents verifying their identity. Though unconventional, he fits with this family. Especially in the way his new adoptive mother, Leigh Anne, fearlessly breaks barriers and standards. She protects him in the way that a mama bear does her cub.
Eventually he starts to play football, and after a few failed attempts he excels. Michael in fact performs so well that he lifts his school into the championship. He subsequently catches the attention of college football coaches, many of them. Football becomes his ticket out of what seems like an inevitable fate, an opportunity he wouldn’t have gotten had he not been adopted. He eventually makes it into the NFL and though never mentioned in the film, subsequently wins a Super Bowl.
This is, of course, an oversimplification of the film. It is filled with great emotional moments that sear themselves into your memory. There are great moments of celebration with each member of this family; moments that will have you evaluating your own life. You should absolutely watch it and add it to your list of favorite films.
Though it is an uplifting story and among my favorite films, I read through a passage that points out elements of this film that are a disquieting. The two main black characters in this film, Michael Oher and his mother, are not self-sufficient. I understand that this is a film based on a true story. Therefore, I understand that there are going to be dramatizations of the facts. However, should we turn the mirror inwards and reflect upon what elements of this film made it so appealing. Is it that we enjoy the story of a white family saving a black teen? I was curious enough about the story that I followed it more closely.
First, Michael Oher was naturally an exceptional football player; he didn’t need to be coached or instructed through his protective instincts. Those elements of the film were dramatizations, though memorable and endearing. He was also an exceptional basketball player; you can see pictures of him playing basketball in high school during the credits. That doesn’t get mentioned.
Second, that conversation between Leigh Anne Tuohy and Michael’s birth mother, Denise Oher may have taken place. What the film neglects to demonstrate was that Denise Oher, managed to get her drug use under control and became a positive force in her son’s life.
Both of those facts are ones that would paint each of these characters in very different light. Do I believe that the Michael Oher’s life took a very different trajectory upon meeting the Tuohy’s? Absolutely! They were a great positive force upon that boy’s life. Similarly, I doubt that he would’ve ended up in the NFL had it not been for them. Was Leigh Anne instrumental in his learning how to play football based on some element of his test scores? No, she was not. Was she the only mother figure that he had as he made his way through life? No, she was not; Denise, his birth mother continued to play a role in his life.
In some ways I feel like an adult telling a young child that Santa Claus is not real, but I then realize that we still enjoy Christmas even as adults. We can know the truth and still enjoy the dramatization. What may ultimately be a better question, would we collectively find this story as appealing if Michael Oher was a little less meek and more self-sufficient? If we knew that his birth mother had a more influential role in his life?
I still love this film. It’s okay to continue to love this film, much like one may love The Princess Bride, as long as we don’t rely on all of it being fact. It’s not.